I have learned that writing helps me clear my head plus it connects me to my Savior in an interesting way. This blog are those thoughts and conversations with Him plus other random writings and thoughts.
I have so much on my heart and so this email will probably be a long one.I plan on sending out emails every so often just to keep everyone updated.I truly feel blessed considering everything I have gone through in the past 2 years.Two years ago I was working for Walmart on the broadcast communications team and was really enjoying my job and where I was in life.I was praying for a few “problems” at work to work out and for God to put me where He wanted me.Never in my wildest dreams would I anticipate what was to come.
On Tuesday, February 10th, 2009 my life changed in ways I couldn’t even imagine and will never fully know on this side of eternity.I was a part of the massive layoff of Walmart employees that day.To make this long story short, basically this set off a chain of “bad stuff” during that year.I thought I would get my non-traditional teaching license and become a teacher and so I set forth pursuing that.On March 1st, 2010 that door was closed along with all other options except for one.I made a decision to go to seminary and started going on tours of my 3 top choices.I felt like I should go to Southwestern, applied and got accepted.By the end of May I had moved back to Pine Bluff with my parents to prepare for my move to Texas.Once there I felt as though I needed to stay in Pine Bluff and go to the extension campus in Little Rock for my first semester.I moved Wednesday, December 29th and am now preparing to start my second semester in seminary and first here in Fort Worth.
I know that God has a bigger plan for my life than I do/did.I have been thinking lately about the Israelites’ in the Old Testament times.I keep saying to myself I don’t want to be like them.All these wonderful and miraculous signs that God loved them and yet they still complained and didn’t follow Him.I wonder how many times I have done this; too many times sadly.He has done so much for me and yet just like a stubborn child that wants this particular doll or that blue monster truck instead of the red, I seem to only remember the bad and say why not “this” Lord.I don’t want to be like them at yet when I look in the mirror that is all I see.One of His daughters that still wants more or who questions why all this “bad” had to happen.Now, I have come to the understanding that I am not ready to do all that again but I would trade the experiences from the last 2 years of my life for anything.It is very hard and there are many days that I just want to stay in bed and hide from the world, but I cannot do that.I have to face each day head on with God as my pilot giving Him full control.I have made the decision in my heart to see this through here even though it is hard and scares me almost daily.I will not go back “home” to the safety and security that Arkansas represents for me.This is my journey and I will travel it with the laughter and tears, with the good and the bad, and I will always try to keep my eyes toward the Son because then your shadow is behind you and you can’t see it.
Things you can be in prayer about for me are classes (start Thurday, Jan. 13th), finding scholarships, finding a job that works with my schedule for school and finding the right church here in Fort Worth.Until next time, I keep you in my prayers and love each of you as my brother or sister in Christ.If you ever need specific prayer, please send it to me so I may take it to the throne of our Lord in prayer for you.